I Wrestled With Satan's Bathtub....

and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.

So. Here's the thing. I buy stuff for my Imp pretty much every payday. Diaper bag. Clothes. Receiving blankets. Burp cloths. All the myriad little things that a baby needs and that I don't want to have to buy all at once. The clothes are a little tough, what with anything over newborn being either "Super!Jock!Manly-Man!" or "Pretty!Princess!Butterfly-McSparkle-Pants!"

Whatever. The Imp will either be a girl who wears dinosaurs and puppies or a boy who wears butterflies and hearts. I'm not into gender-roles. Any road...so I buy little things for the Imp and I'm starting to buy some big things for the Imp. One of which is the Imp's bath tub.

Now, let me say I am a great believer in the power of Ebay and thrift stores. Second-hand can be great quality, and a great way to save money. As a SMBC, and a teacher to boot, saving money is going to be a Very Good Thing. So, as I ebay one day (hehe, poetry!) I come across an EvenFlo Splash-With-Me Extendable baby tub.

"What ho?" says the Elf. "An extendable baby tub? Easy locking grips? Three positions for growing baby? Coolness."

Oh, naive, foolish Elf. But she buys it anyway, 'cause for fifteen bucks, it's a pretty good deal.

In the future, this Elf will be thoroughly reviewing any products she purchases for the Imp...although in my defense, who expects EvenFlo to be in league with the Devil?

So I get the tub. And it's very pretty, and well packed, and has neat little features.

And absolutely refuses to be put together.

There's these little ribs on two halves that you have to slide together, slotting a foam strip of sealing into the grooves to create a leak-proof seal and lock the two halves together. The catch? The freakin' ribs are all different sizes, and because of this, the tub half slides neatly down on one side, and goes all off track on the other side because it won't fit properly into the corresponding rib!

Picture those old Benny Hill type skits where they're trying to push a dead guy into a coffin, and first his legs shoot up, but when they press his legs down, his torso shoots up, and hilarity ensues.

Well, hilarity did not ensue here. There was a distinct lack of hilarity. There was, however, a lot of this Elf losing her religion over and over again and turning the air a rather lovely shade of blue.

I did finally manage to get the darn thing together...with use of a screw driver to prise the slots further apart, leaning my full weight onto it to pin the sides together long enough to lock it into place, and pounding on the back of it 'til it sat properly.

30 freakin' minutes.

It's currently sitting in my sink full of water to see if this purported "leak proof" seal really is leak-proof. One drop of water on my floor, man. Just one. This thing'll be out with the trash soooo fast. Grrrrrr.

Caveat Emptor, I guess. But DANG!!!!

Oh well, at least I have a funny story for the Imp someday.

"When Mommy was getting ready for you to come, she had many adventures...."

Things Elfgirl is looking forward to: May 22nd! Indy's back!

Things currently annoying the crap out of her: Satan's Washtub. Obviously.

Pretty boy of the moment: Adrian Pasdar. Is it time for Heroes to be back yet?