Why Mapquest Should Die in a Fire

Heyas,

So...obedience classes. Hehe, my little baby's all grown up and going to school! *sniff sniff*

Yes, I anthropomorphize my pets something awful. What of it?

I'll start off by saying that obedience class was pretty awesome. There were actually a couple dogs that were bigger than Marley (granted, one of them was a Mastiff--and let me tell you, an untrained Mastiff? Scary thing. Real talk.) and Marley did really well 'cause he already knew most of the basic commands we worked on. I think he'll do better at home...he's a very distractible dog and constantly interested in what's going on around him. But, he did good, and wasn't nearly as crazy as I thought he'd be.

Heh, although, he made us late back to the class after the break when he had to find juuuuuuust the right place to poop outside.

I just found it ironic that the dog that belonged to the teacher held up the class. Teacher humor, gotta love it.

The class looks like it's gonna be fun (even with the old couple that sat outside the ring we were in with their ridiculous little beribboned mini-poodle and glowered at me and Marley disapprovingly. Marley was one of only a few mutts there and I think they were doggie-snobs. Jerks.) so I'll consider it seventy bucks well spent.

However, getting there was an adventure.

I'm seriously thinking there's some kind of universal conspiracy against me. Truly! How can it be possible for someone to have luck THIS bad and not get struck by lightning or something?

HYPOTHETICALLY SPEAKING!!!! Okay Universe? That was not a suggestion.

Honestly, it's statistically unlikely that things like this should KEEP happening to one person...can't I get some weird luck in the form of a winning lottery ticket or something?

Any road...why Mapquest should die in a fire:

ahem

The place where the class is held is, like, ten miles from my apartment. Mapquest tells me it's a four step process. One exit onto a highway, one exit off of a highway, one left turn onto a road, one right turn onto a road, and the building is on the right.

Easy, right?

*laughs cynically*

So I get on and off the highway just fine...but I cannot for the life of me find the left turn. I drive alllllllll the way up the boulevard I'm supposed to turn off of (like, ten miles) until it deadends into a field that would be a perfect dumpsite for a body...turn around and go alllllllll the way up the other end of the boulevard I'm supposed to turn off of, to where it dead ends into a turnoff for a really scary-looking part of town.

Turn around and try the other end again, this time finding the WEST end of the road I need to be on (the dog club is on the EAST end) and follow it only to deadend into a waste-treatment plant next to a golf course.

And who's bright idea was THAT?

Turn around and somehow manage to end up back at the exit for the highway, though I'm not entirely certain how.

At this point it occurs to me to call the dog club and be all, "um, where are you people?" and spend about five minutes on the phone with a really nice old guy who was very worried that I was driving all alone, 'cause the club itself is in a decent neighborhood, but the roads leading to it really are not.

I assured him I had a full tank of gas and my Labra-Horse in the back seat...but evidently a woman driving by herself was a Very Bad Thing.

It doesn't offend me when old guys pull that stuff with me. they're usually so sweet about it, and genuinel distressed on my account. It's heartwarming.

ANYway...on, like, my third pass on the freakin' boulevard I finally find the turn off. And no lie, it just appeared. I'd swear in a court of law that it wasn't there the first two times I passed that section of road...but whatever. That's just how my life works.

So, the ten minute drive actually took closer to forty five minutes, but I got into the class okay, and Marley did well, and I had a good time...so all is good.

Things this Elf is looking forward to: I'm going to see Wicked in November! Wheeeeeee!
Things currently annoying the crap out of her: Mapquest. Bastards.
Pretty boy of the moment: Chris O'Donnell. Oh Robin, you've aged *well*. I can't decide if I like your show or not...but if you and LL Cool J keep dripping the sexual tension like that, I think I'll be a very happy camper.